Feb 012010
 

Last year, I discovered my extreme sexual attraction to women and since then, my desire for men has been decreasing. I’ve never been with a woman sexually but intend to really soon. I am wondering if perhaps my attraction for the same sex is simply stemming from my bad relationships with guys (one being a sex addict male cousin) or if I’m really a lesbian. Can I be so attracted and turned on by women without being a lesbian? Is this normal? Or can I be a straight female who is just disgusted with guys at the moment?

My advice to you is to stop worrying so much about labels and identities like “straight” and “lesbian,” and just follow your heart. You may be one or the other, or you may be bisexual, but in any case, what you call yourself isn’t the most important thing, especially right now. It sounds like your attraction to women is new, and I would say that if you feel it that strongly, it probably has nothing to do with your attraction, or lack thereof, to men. If you feel attracted to a woman, then I encourage you to trust your instincts and explore the possibilities.