Oct 202015
 

Children holding hands

The LA Academy of Sex Education presents Opening Up: An Open Relationship Intensive Workshop with Tristan Taormino on Sunday, November 15 from 1:00-4:00 pm at The Stockroom in Los Angeles. How do people create nontraditional partnerships that are loving and fulfilling? There are few established scripts or visible role models for open relationships, so people in them can often struggle without support and guidance. In this four hour intensive program, sex and relationship educator Tristan Taormino shares some of the key principles that can help your open relationships succeed. She will review some of the most common styles of open relationships, from partnered nonmonogamy to solo polyamory, and discuss how to customize them to meet your individual needs and wants. She will share wisdom from the over 100 people she interviewed and profiled in her bestselling book Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships. The workshop will address common issues and problems including: new relationship energy, time management, sexual and emotional safety, boundary setting, agreement violations, and coping with change. Through creative exercises, you’ll discover how to unpack all the different elements of jealousy and identify what triggers your jealousy and how it manifests for you; learn to develop coping strategies and find access points to the practice of compersion. Learn how to tackle challenges including: communicating about highly-charged topics, conflict resolution skills, the art of re-negotiation, roadblocks to fulfillment, and confronting fear. Whether you’re a newcomer or veteran to the world beyond monogamy, come discover strategies to help you nurture and grow your open relationships. Open to people in all kinds of relationship configurations as well as solos and singles of all genders and sexual orientations. Seating is limited and pre-registration is strongly encouraged.

Location: The Stockroom, 2809 1/2 Sunset Boulevard 
Los Angeles, CA 90026.
Admission:
Register at Eventbrite. Open to people in all kinds of relationship configurations as well as solos and singles of all genders and sexual orientations. Seating is limited and pre-registration is strongly encouraged.

We have several different ticket types available:

Regular $100
VIP $125: priority seating, personalized signed copy of Opening Up, gift bag
VIP + Dinner $200: priority seating, personalized signed copy of Opening Up, autographed DVD, luxury gift bag, dinner with Tristan after the workshop

 

Oct 042015
 

SDS
Tristan is headed to the Southeast in October, so catch her at one of these places:

October 13  
Florida Atlantic University
, Boca Raton, FL

October 15-17
Sex Down South, Atlanta, GA

October 18
Sex Educator Boot Camp 1.5, Washington DC

October 19  
Anal Sex for Everyone at Sugar, Baltimore, MD

Jun 152015
 

AMOROUS REVOLT

AR new logo
Amorous Revolt
is a brand new Queer Camping event happening from July 31-August 2, 2015. This event is designed by queer people for queer people to build and foster intentional communities for support, education and play. Amorous Revolt features skillshares and workshops including kink, crafts, health, life skills and spirituality, as well as networking events, dance parties, and performances.

In an effort to make the event as accessible as possible, we have an organized rideshare system, ASL interpreters, 24/7 medical staff, and an emotional support space. We also have community organized cabin, play and workshop spaces for People of Color, Transgender/Gender Nonconforming People, Sober folks, and Neurodiverse folks.

Please join us at the first ever Amorous Revolt July 31-August 2, 2015 at Ramblewood in Darlington, Maryland. For more information visit our site or join us on Fetlife, Facebook, and Twitter.

ALSO in JULY….

hearts
In Dallas, Texas on July 24 2015, PolyDallas2015 is hosting the Affirming Polyamorous and Non-Monogamous Relationship Symposium. It is being held at the office of Vantage Point Counseling Services. This is the first symposium, with a primary focus on polyamorous relationship and family structure, to be held in the Dallas/Fort Worth [DFW] area. Co-Presenters Ruby B Johnson and Shawn Chrisman hope to contribute to the knowledge base of mental health practitioners and other community providers. For those attendees who are not in the DFW area, this symposium is offered as a live webinar stream.

Polyamorous and Non-Monogamous relationships have become more visible over the last decade. The way individuals, in their 20s to early 30s (Millennials), are relating, connecting, attracting, and permitting themselves to have non-traditional relationships is creating a more sex positive and dynamic relationship structure. However, Generation X proves to have a different experience and expectation of relationships and their structure.

Hence the exposure, experience, and knowledge base of these different relationships is mysterious to many mental health and substance abuse providers within the community. Demystifying and educating providers is key to providing a conducive non-shaming therapeutic environment. Providing knowledge is a practice of cultural competence; infusing cultural humility into practice creates authenticity and positive regard within the clinician.

To support these principles of the helping relationship, the content richly addresses definitions of polyamory and non-monogamy, coupled with a graph which offers a visual aid for attendees. Heteronormative and monogamous privilege is exposed as well as how those forms of privilege create challenges to provider’s beliefs, values, and norms of relationships. To assist with unpacking privilege, myths and misconceptions of these relationships are debunked. Next, the focus shifts to the therapist and other helping professionals.

With each one of the tenets of cultural humility, solutions, techniques, and suggestions for change are offered that include (not limited to) unconscious bias, racial bias, counter transference, professional boundaries, dual relationships, microaggressions,, social, political, economic bias, sex positivity versus sex addiction, and intellectual privilege (Dunning-Kruger Effect).

Certain theories have been shown to assist with effective practice such as systems, constructivism, Bowenian, feminist, and gender queer. Techniques such as the genogram, gender/relationship inclusive assessments, narrative versus structured assessment, collaborative (with client) treatment planning and interventions, including considerations for cultural, social, community, and services barriers. Additionally, one must be aware of community resources and support.

Please follow us on Twitter @polydallas2015.

Presenters:

Ruby B Johnson (LMSW, LCDC, SAP, CSAT Candidate) received her Bachelors of Social Work in 2003 from Texas Women’s University and her Masters of Social Work in 2005 from the University of Texas at Arlington. Since 2003, Ruby’s roles have included clinical practitioner, community and professional development educator, and graduate and under graduate adjunct professor. In private practice, her areas of expertise are substance use disorders, sex addiction, intimacy and love addiction, multi-cultural families and couples, SOGIE, polyamorous/non monogamous partnerships/families, and Kink/BDSM. Ruby Johnson provides therapeutic support, care, and intervention with lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, gender variant/non-binary, queer, and same gender loving communities. Currently, Ruby is in private practice at Vantage Point Counseling Services and Inamorata LLC.

She has presented at several national, state, and local conferences including Society of Social Work Research Conference, Council of Social Work Education Conference, DFW Behavioral Health Symposium, and, most recently, her proposals were accepted at The State Texas Association of Addiction Professionals Conference and Black Families, Black Relationships, and Black Sexuality Conference in Philadelphia. Ruby is a member of various professional organizations including Texas Association of Addiction Professionals [TAAP], Association of Addiction Professionals [NAADAC], International Institute of Trauma and Addiction Professionals [IITAP], American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists [AASECT], Society for Advancement of Sexual Health [SASH] and most recently, Association of Black Sexologists and Clinicians [ABSC].

Shawn Chrisman (MS, LPC, PhD Candidate) is currently a practicing Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Texas.  He received his clinical training with a Master’s in Counseling from Southern Methodist University, and is currently working towards his doctorate degree in Human Sexuality from Widener University.

Shawn works with individuals and couples on sexuality-related issues, including addressing intimacy, sexual identity, gender dysphoria, sexual dysfunctions and other concerns.  Shawn also identifies as a kink-aware therapist and works with couples enjoying diverse relationship structures, such as open or polyamorous relationships.  Shawn is an active member of American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) and The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality (SSSS).  He has also presented workshops for professionals and community members at local universities and organizations. Shawn has been published in Qualitative Health Research.

Jun 032015
 

hearts
Cultural Humility and Affirming Polyamorous and Non-Monogamous Relationships
Organized and facilitated by Shawn Chrisman and Ruby B Johnson
June 26, 2015
Vantage Point Counseling
3300 Oaklawn Ave, Suite 415
Dallas, Texas 75219
for more details, go to polydallas2015.com.

Polyamorous and Non-Monogamous relationships have increased over the last decade. The way individuals, in the 20’s to early 30’s or Millennials, are relating, connecting, attracting, and permitting themselves to have non-traditional relationships is creating a more sex positive and dynamic relationship structure. However, Generation X proves to have a different experience and expectation of relationships and their structure.

Hence the exposure, experience, and knowledge base of these different relationships is esoteric to many mental health and substance abuse providers within the community. Demystifying and educating providers is key to providing a conducive non-shaming therapeutic environment. However providing knowledge is a practice of cultural competence, infusing cultural humility into practice creates authenticity and positive regard within the clinician.

To support these principles of the helping relationship, the content richly addresses definitions of polyamory and non-monogamy, coupled with a graph which offers a visual aide for attendees, under language, Unpacking heteronormative and monogamy privilege is exposed as well as the challenge to provider’s beliefs, values, and norms of relationships. To assist with unpacking privilege, myths and misconceptions of these relationships are debunked. Next, the focus shifts to the therapist.
The way of being, in the helping profession, is cultural humility. The four tenants of cultural humility are:

Commitment to lifelong learning & critical self-reflection
Recognize/challenge power imbalances
Develop & maintain mutually respectful dynamic partnerships based on mutual trust
Institutional accountability

With each one of the tenets, solutions, techniques, and suggestions for change are offered that include (not limited to) unconscious bias, racial bias, counter transference, professional boundaries, dual relationships, microaggressions,, social, political, economic bias, sex positivity versus sex addiction, and intellectual privilege (Dunning-Kruger Affect).

Certain theories have been shown to assist with effective practice such systems, constructivism, Bowenian, feminist, and gender queer. Techniques such as the genogram, gender/relationship
inclusive assessments, narrative versus structured assessment, collaborative (with client) treatment planning and interventions, including considerations for cultural, social, community, and services barriers. Additionally, one must be aware of community resources and support.

May 272015
 

cover

For five years, Cooper S. Beckett has written for the website Life on the Swingset. Now he has collected personal essays, stories, erotica, and prescriptive “how-tos” into this memoir of his life on The Swingset. Beckett may be biased when it comes to swinging, polyamory, and other forms of ethical non-monogamy, but he doesn’t sugar-coat it. He speaks honestly and earnestly about a unique way to live life, one that allows for sexual and loving growth and experimentation and a strong sense of community. This week we’ll talk social anxiety and shyness, recognizing the importance of touch in life, evolving feelings about love and expectations, having threesomes, orgies, and prostate orgasms, going through a divorce, and leveling up in life and sexuality.

Tune in to Sex Out Loud this Friday, May 29th at 5 pm PT / 8 pm ET. This week’s show is LIVE so call in to Voice America with questions and comments at 1-866-472-5788, join the discussion on Facebook or Twitter, or e-mail me via tristan(at)puckerup.com and I’ll read them live on the air. Tune in to Sex Out Loud every Friday, you can listen along on your computer, tablet, or phone, find all the ways at SexOutLoudRadio.com!

cooper beckettAuthor of My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory, creator and host of Life on the Swingset, a website and podcast by and for the sexually open. In addition to writing for the site and hosting the weekly podcast about sexuality and non-monogamy, Cooper Beckett travels the globe throwing play parties and teaching classes to help people open themselves up and color outside the lines of their sexuality.

Nov 202014
 

AA_More_Than_Two_051-ER

This Friday on November 21st at 8 pm ET / 5 pm PT, I will be live on Sex Out Loud radio with Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert, the co-authors of the new book, More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory, a hands-on toolkit for having happy, successful polyamorous relationships. They discuss their new book as well as their latest project, Thorntree Press a new, independent publishing company with a focus on rational, evidence-based approaches to sex and relationships, as well as sharing real-life stories. They’ll also answer listener questions about navigating non-traditional relationships.

This week’s show is LIVE so call in with questions and comments at 1-866-472-5788, join the discussion on Facebook or Twitter, or e-mail me via tristan(at)puckerup.com and I’ll read them live on the air. Tune in to Sex Out Loud every Friday, you can listen along on your computer, tablet, or phone, find all the ways at SexOutLoudRadio.com!

Franklin Veaux is the co-author of the groundbreaking new book More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory, and the author of the top-ranked polyamory site on the Web, morethantwo.com. He is also the creator of Onyx: The Game of Sexual Exploration, maintains the sites xeromag.com and symtoys.com, which include extensive writings about BDSM, publishes erotic fiction under the pen name William Vitelli, and is the co-founder of the publishing company Thorntree Press and the sex toy R&D company Tacit Pleasures. Franklin started practicing non-monogamy from the moment he started becoming aware that boys and girls are different. He started writing about it in 1998. Over the decades, he’s made just about every mistake it’s possible to make in polyamorous relationships. Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from poor judgment. Today, he has five partners, lives in Portland, Oregon, and spends a great deal of time writing about everything from relationship ethics to transhumanism to computer security.

Eve Rickert is a professional writer, editor and mastermind, and the co-author of the the new book More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory. Until taking time off from life to write the book and go on a book tour, she co-organized a group for poly women in Vancouver, Canada, and she blogs at the More Than Two website. She owns a science communications firm in Vancouver, Canada, called Talk Science to Me, and she is the co-founder of the publishing company Thorntree Press and the smart sex toy R&D company Tacit Pleasures. Eve has been living poly since 2008, though her poly roots go back much deeper. Her approach to poly has changed radically over the years: from early experiences in high school, to first hearing the word “polyamory” in 1998, to first swingers’ party in 2006, to her current three long-term relationships. And being poly has radically changed her. She’s made a lot of mistakes and learned a lot of hard lessons. She co-wrote More Than Two to share those experiences with anyone who is struggling to maintain ethical multiple relationships with integrity, compassion and courage.

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Sep 182014
 

cooper beckettSex Out Loud radio is BACK! After a brief hiatus of summer reruns, I’m live tomorrow night at 8 pm ET / 5 pm talking with Cooper Beckett host of the popular podcast “Life on the Swingset” (and who you also know as the voice announcer of my show). Cooper will give us an update on what happened at CatalystCon West last week. We’ll also discuss progressive swinging and swingers, orgy etiquette, and answer listener questions about polyamory and non-monogamy.

This week’s show is LIVE – and I’ve missed talking to my listeners, so I hope you’re ready to talk to me. Find out all the ways to listen here so you can call in with questions and comments at 1-866-472-5788, join the discussion on Facebook or Twitter, or e-mail me via tristan(at)puckerup.com and I’ll read them live on the air.

Cooper Beckett‘s life isn’t like other people’s. When he’s not writing or podcasting at Life on the Swingset, he’s living it up as an evangelical swinger drifting toward poly, spreading the good word that “sharing is caring.” He truly believes that a good many people would be open to exploring the fringe of human sexuality and relationships, knocking down the borders between orientations, and experiencing the most basic of human rights: great sex, if only they were told it’s okay to do so. He has resolved to change the world, even if it’s only one couple at a time.

Sex Out Loud airs every Friday at 5 pm PT / 8 pm ET on the VoiceAmerica Variety channel. You can listen on your computer, phone, or tablet, find all the ways here!

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Jan 152014
 

PolyamoristsNextDoor4Eli_4416sm LinkedIn Anita Wagner Illig TT

This Friday, January 17th on Sex Out Loud radio I’m live talking about polyamory, non-monogamy, the current reality of relationships and how we can change future ideas about what is a healthy and sustainable norm. Dr. Eli Sheff returns to the show having just released her book “The Polyamorists Next Door: Inside Multiple Partner Relationships and Families“, a culmination of her 15 years of research on the topic. We also have Anita Wagner Illig, founder of Practical Polyamory, a leader and educator whose work has provided many resources to people.

This week’s show is LIVE, which means we’ll be giving away a Sportsheets prize to a lucky fan. Find out all the ways to listen here so you can call in with questions and comments at 1-866-472-5788, join the discussion on Facebook or Twitter, or e-mail me via tristan(at)puckerup.com and I’ll read them live on the air – you could be chosen to win!

Anita Wagner Illig is a thought leader, coach, writer, spokesperson and educator on polyamory, relationship choice and families of the heart. She serves on the Advisory Council of The Woodhull Sexual Freedom Alliance, is a past organizer of the Polyamory Leadership Summit, is an active member of the Polyamory Leadership Network, and also serves as polyamory community advisor to CARAS – the Community-Academic Consortium for Research on Alternative Sexualities. She is a faculty member at KinkAcademy.com and PassionateU.com. She has served as a member of the Board of Directors of Loving More® and Unitarian Universalists for Polyamory Awareness, and is co-founder and former member of the Board of Directors of the Institute for 21st Century Relationships/the Foundation of the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom. She is also a past board member of the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom. Anita has presented educational programs on polyamory and family/relationship choice at Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit, Momentum con, Poly Living, Loving More Retreats, Atlanta Poly Retreat (Keynote), Transcending Boundaries, Washington Area Secular Humanists, Good Vibrations, The Floating World, Sex 2.0, Dark Odyssey, Black Rose, Fetfest, Southeast Leather Fest, Building Bridges, Free Spirit Beltane Gathering, Florida Poly Retreat, and to a variety of alternative sexual and relationship organizations. She has keynoted and been a featured speaker at polyamory conferences and pride celebrations and has authored articles on polyamory and bisexuality. Anita has appeared on television in interviews on polyamory in Washington, DC and Baltimore and in news articles in The New York Times, Newsweek, the Baltimore Sun, Washington Post, BBC and Salon.com, amongst many others.

With a Ph.D. in Sociology,[1] 15 years of teaching[2] and research experience,[3] and certifications as a Guardian Ad Litem/Court Appointed Special Advocate[4] and a sexuality educator,[5] Dr. Elisabeth Sheff has the education, experience, and credentials to provide flawless legal and educational consultation. Dr. Sheff is the foremost academic and legal expert on polyamory in the United States, and the worldwide expert on polyamorous families. Her academic research has focused on sexual minorities and their families. Dr. Sheff’s Polyamorous Families study followed poly families with children for 15 years, tracing the evolution of the families and the progress of the children. This unparalleled study has resulted in numerous professional and academic publications. In her Overlapping Identities and Are You Kinky? studies, Dr. Sheff examined the intersections between and among unconventional sexual identities, including swingers, kinksters (people who practice BDSM or sadomasochism), and polyamorists.

Dr. Sheff is widely recognized by her peers and the media as an international expert in polyamory and BDSM. She served as the chair of the Sexual, Behavior, Politics, and Communities Division for the Society for the Study of Social Problems (SSSP) from In addition to serving as the polyamory expert and IRB compliance specialist for the Community Academic Alliance for Research on Alternative Sexualities (CARAS), Dr. Sheff founded the online research community PolyResearchers that has grown to include 327 members in 17 different countries and 16 different fields.

Her extensive media interviews include national outlets like Newsweek, The Boston Globe, and National Public Radio, and international sources such as Semana magazine in Columbia, Mente e Cervello (the Italian edition of Scientific American), Elle magazine in Quebec, and the Sunday London Times. In addition to appearing in the National Geographic television series Taboo episode entitled “Odd Couples” and the documentary BDSM: Education and Experience, Dr. Sheff has provided background information for several television shows including the Discovery Channel’s I’m Pregnant And…, and the Canadian National Television series The Bigger Picture as well as numerous interviews with online magazines like Momlogic.com and Seattle Met, and podcasts like Polyamory Weekly and How Stuff Works.

Dr. Sheff has the expertise, training, experience, credentials and education to provide effective testimony regarding gender, families, sexuality, communities, and especially on the families of sexual minorities and unconventional relationships. She also possesses rare knowledge useful to counselors, therapists, nurses, and lawyers, as well as the teaching experience necessary to present the information in an interesting and accessible format.

Sex Out Loud airs every Friday at 5 pm PT / 8 pm ET on the VoiceAmerica Variety channel. You can listen on your computer, phone, or tablet, find all the ways here!

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[1] Ph.D. in Sociology from the University of Colorado, Boulder, 2005

[2] Teaching at the University of Colorado, Boulder; University of Montana, Missoula; and Georgia State University, Atlanta

[3] The Polyamorous Families Study (1997 – 2012); The Overlapping Sexual Identities Study (2005 – 2006); The Are you Kinky? Study (2006 – 2011)

[4] State of Georgia, Bar Association

Nov 202013
 

Minx hs 2013

A new installment in our CatalystCon West 2013 series of episodes recorded in front of a live studio audience, this week on Sex Out Loud radio I interview Cunning Minx, the poly and kinky sex-positive educator and activist who has been the producer and host of the Polyamory Weekly podcast since spring of 2005. Minx will share how she got into polyamory, sex education, and podcasting, and how those lessons inform her teachings on poly, kinky and Web 2.0 community-building topics. Plus, she answers questions from the studio audience.

Cunning Minx is the sultry-voiced producer and host of the Polyamory Weekly podcast, now with over 300 episodes in production. The podcast shares tales from the front of responsible non-monogamy from a pansexual, kink-friendly point of view. A kinky boobiesexual, Minx founded the show as a resource for the poly and poly-curious to form a community, share experiences and help guide each other on their journeys of poly and kinky exploration. Minx has been a submissive, bottom and otherwise generally non-dominant type for the past ten years. Minx has spoken on poly, kinky and Web 2.0 community-building topics at ShibariCon, Geek Girl Con, CatalystCon, MomentumCon, Atlanta Poly Weekend, Sex 2.0, Leather Leadership Conference, Dragon*Con, GD2, Heartland Polyamory Conference, New York Poly Pride and Poly Living. The Poly Weekly podcast is the winner of the 2007 Erotic Award for Best Podcast and has received accolades from ErosZine, Fleshbot and the Chicago Sun-Times.

 

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Oct 222013
 

marcia b

Recorded live at Catalyst Con West 2013, this week’s episode of Sex Out Loud on Friday, October 25th at 5 pm PT / 8 pm ET features relationship coach, writer, and sex educator Marcia Baczynski. Tristan talks with Marcia about her journey to becoming a relationship coach and sex educator, including specializing in helping people articulate their desires in relationships and ask for what they want. She’ll also share info from her latest book, “Four Mistakes Couples Make When Opening Up Their Relationship (and How To Avoid Them)” and discuss her latest project, The Good Girl Recovery Program.

Marcia Baczynski is a relationship coach, writer and sex educator who has spent the last 10+ years specializing in helping people figure out — and ask for — what they want in life, love and in the bedroom. She has taught workshops across the US, been on TV, radio, magazines and newspapers in 27 countries, (including Montel Williams, People magazine, NPR, and the Washington Post). She regularly receives letters and email from people around the world, all wanting a deeper understanding of how to ask for and get what they want in life, love and the bedroom. As the co-founder of Cuddle Party, (www.cuddleparty.com) she has helped thousands of people find solid footing around issues of intimacy, touch, boundaries and communication. Since its founding in 2004, Cuddle Party has grown to include over 80 facilitators in 8 different countries. In 2009, Marcia started Asking For What You Want, a series of coaching programs and workshops to help people identify (and ask for!) what they wanted in their sex lives and relationships. Her ebook “4 Mistakes Couples Make When Opening Up Their Relationships (And How To Avoid Them)” is available at www.successfulnonmonogamy.com Marcia’s most recent project is The Good Girl Recovery Program, which can be found at goodgirlrecovery.com

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