Aug 242012
 

 

Cabaret Desire, a new adult film by Erika Lust, is truly a work of art. Set inside a haven of erotic storytelling, this film transports viewers to a mystical world of play, desire, fantasy, and sex. It feels like a grown-up fairytale. Pole dancers sweat. Soft music plays. Drinks are poured. Patrons weave in and out. A fierce-looking Madame watches the events unfold. However, the central theme of Cabaret Desire revolves around the storytellers, who are paid to share tales of love and lust. These sagas quickly evolve into their own steamy scenes, making this a fairytale where everyone gets a happy ending—especially you.

There are four, unique (yet equally compelling) stories in Cabaret Desire. The first follows a young, busty, tattooed woman (Sophia Prada). She is torn between two lovers. The catch? Both of her lovers are named Alex —one is female, one is male, and they each believe that they are her exclusive partner. She balances this affair for a while, successfully convincing either Alex that they are the only one she serenades in the park or fucks on the couch. But the audience is onto her little secret. Erika Lust masterfully juxtaposes the dates—and the sex—creating a beautiful montage of all the strap-on wearing, genital licking, finger-fucking that takes place with between Prada and either Alex.

The next plotline is the kinkiest (which isn’t saying much—Cabaret Desire is definitely for folks looking for a softer erotic flick). A mustachioed storyteller speaks of his mother—an art historian with a penchant for thievery and latex. Seconds later, we watch a beautiful woman in full-body latex (Lourdes “Lady Diamond”) break into a parlor and tie an unsuspecting man to a chair. After cutting off his boxers with scissors (a splash of danger) and sucking his cock, she proceeds to unzip the crotch of her latex suit and sit on his face. The scene ends with them fucking and the surprising discovery that this man is the father of her child.

Following the tale of the latex mommy comes a birthday girl (Liandra Dahl) who, for the big 3-0, gets a very special present. Her friends orchestrate for her to be blindfolded and led to a warehouse. In a room draped with white fabric, she sees a man (Matisse). She admits to having been interested in him for a while and the pair sucks, fucks, and cums on the cloud-like bed. The lighting makes this scene seem almost romantic, and yet we are fully aware that their interaction is a gift-exchange, thus complicating the typical romance narrative.

The last story features a man (Didac Duran) and a woman (Samia Duarte) who once shared a passionate, sex-filled weekend (which we, the viewers, are blessed to see snippets of). Now, a year later, the partners are meeting up. Both are quite curious about whether their old spark will still be there…and so are we.

These storylines are brought to life by the performers and their wonderful chemistry. Best of all, Cabaret Desire features a range of bodies—all of which look incredibly real. You can see small pockmarks, belly rolls, and a variety of pubic hairstyles. This beautiful depiction of the human form makes the film come across as more intimate, almost as if you are peeking into the real-life stories of a lucky few.

All in all, Cabaret Desire is a must-see film for anyone looking for the perfect mix of porn and art. As I mentioned earlier, it is not hardcore, but don’t let that deter you. The cinematography, music, and interwoven plotlines make it enjoyable even on a non-erotic level. So let your brain linger in a magical world of sex and storytelling. You won’t be disappointed.

Buy Cabaret Desire: Good Vibrations (DVD) or Hot Movies for Her (VOD)

~~~

Abby Spector is a recent graduate of Wesleyan University, where she majored in Feminist/Gender/Sexuality Studies. She is currently interning for Tristan, a job that allows her to write about sex, research feminist porn, and play with dogs (among other, equally awesome things). When she isn’t working, Abby enjoys comfortable nudity and salty foods. Her dream? A world where she could sit around naked and eat overly-salted french fries. Her blog is Sexy Awkward Times.

Aug 222012
 

 

I like men and I like having sex with them. However, I find it difficult to tell them what I like, since I’m not sure what I like myself. Plus, I’m an irregular orgasm-er with masturbation. Worse, it’s porn-conditioned: I most frequently get off to porn. Without porn, it’s pretty darn difficult. These days, what usually gets me off, non-porn wise, is imagining going down on another woman. Fun, huh?

I am only at the beginning of my active sexual life. What am I to do?? Help!

Overwhelmed Toronto Tart

Start by patting yourself on the back (or your pussy). You can have orgasms! So what if they are masturbation-based or require porn? Many people struggle with achieving an orgasm in any capacity. But you, my friend, have a general understanding of how to get yourself off. Congratulations.

However, when it comes to cumming, it’s nice to have a better-than-general understanding of your pleasure points. So grab a vibrator, glob on some lube, and explore your body. Learn what you like. Push yourself (within limits of safety and comfort) to test new positions and sensations. In terms of orgasms, we are our own best teachers. Self-pleasure is the first lesson plan.

Now onto your porn woes…stop worrying. Just because you get off easiest from porn does not mean that you will lead a life of solo orgasms and subsequent spinsterhood.   Pornography does not have to be experienced alone. Watching porn with a partner can be an incredibly arousing experience, especially when it sparks creative juices (which, in turn, can spark your juices). Find out what porn your partner(s) enjoys. If this conversation seems too daunting, curl up in bed with an explicit yet not-quite-pornographic film. I recommend Y Tu Mamá También or Sex and Lucia (gotta love the Spanish).

And you’re right—it is fun to fantasize about going down on women! Have you ever tried having sex with a woman (outside of your imagination)? You might love it. You might loathe it. I think it’s worth the try (then again, I think everything is worth a try). You’re just starting your sexually active life. It’s prime time for experimentation.

~~~

Abby Spector is a recent graduate of Wesleyan University, where she majored in Feminist/Gender/Sexuality Studies. She is currently interning for Tristan, a job that allows her to write about sex, research feminist porn, and play with dogs (among other, equally awesome things). When she isn’t working, Abby enjoys comfortable nudity and salty foods. Her dream? A world where she could sit around naked and eat overly-salted french fries. Her blog is Sexy Awkward Times.

 

Aug 152012
 

This Friday, Sex Out Loud will be coming to you LIVE from LA! I’m talking to adult film stars Danny Wylde and Lily LaBeau about what it’s like to be performers in a relationship. They’ll reveal the best part of dating another porn star, what they fight about, and the difference between sex on screen and off screen. I will ask them about monogamy, their favorite directors, interacting with fans, and what they think about the recent condom mandate in LA. Plus, we’ll hear about their latest venture together: HotelLaBeau.com.

Lily Labeau is an AVN-nominated actress and model named “Next Star of the Year” by CAVR. She is the creative force behind LilyLuvs.com, InsideLilyLaBeau.com, and soon, HotelLaBeau.com. Danny Wylde is a pornographer, writer, musician, and filmmaker living in Los Angeles, California.

Jul 242012
 

We’re starting to review feminist porn titles on the site, and here is our first one. I had the chance to see a screening of some excerpts of Sexing The Transman XXX on the big screen in Toronto during the Feminist Porn Awards. I remember when I first heard Buck’s voice on film as he talked to his interview subjects from behind the camera, I thought, “Buck sounds like some creepy dirty old man.” Then I watched, and along with this dialogue were these long, lingering camera shots, following the ripple in a guy’s chest, the muscle definition of his arm. Buck and his camera were ogling these men – objectifying them even. It was all so lascivious and voyeuristic. It even reminded me of some of those old straight porn movies where the camera guy checks out the woman he’s filming in a really leering way. And then it struck me: we never see transmale bodies objectified or sexualized. We rarely see them naked or represented in erotic contexts. Buck’s camera was not simply ogling, it was worshipping these trans male bodies and his voice reinforced this adoration. The whole thing is incredibly subversive. Now, here’s Raybear’s take on the film. —Tristan

Since 2005, Buck Angel has proven himself to be a tenacious and consistent porn star in representing who he is and how he likes to fuck on screen, without a trace of shame or apology. In fact, he displays quite the opposite – absolute confidence and pride in his body and sexuality. His latest move, Sexing The Transman XXX, is an educational porn that expands his trademark attitude into the bedroom of other transmen. Buck is primarily behind the camera in this film, playing the role of sexy interrogator who asks each guy provocative questions about their gender, their body, their transition, and most importantly what turns them on, which leads them to strip down and show us how they like to get off. Sure Buck quizzes the guys about hormones and surgery, but he asks with even more enthusiasm about tattoos and working out.

A variety of toys to stimulate different parts and holes for each solo scene, including such favorites as a Feeldoe dildo, a Hitachi vibrator, and NJoy anal plugs. The film focuses on four different transmen, each at different stages of their own transition and with their own sexual predilections – MJ identifies himself as flamboyant, Eddie Wood is a hairy squirter, Sean sports ink and muscles. During the James Darling interview, he informs us he’d been on hormones since he was 18 and Buck Angel was the first transman he’d ever met, and in that moment I was able to really appreciate the reach of Buck and his work. This movie answers a lot of common questions posed to transmen, such as effects of hormones, body changes, and surgical procedures, but is done with the respect and understanding of a fellow transman and not in the least bit dry and boring. It’s also a well-edited film, both visually (picture-in-a-picture orgasm shot!) and sonically (opera arias and rock music that don’t drown out the sexy live sounds of the performers). After the four solo performances, Buck finishes the film with a fuck scene between himself and Fallen in a seedy basement romper room complete with wood paneled walls.

Sexing the Transman is an informational PSA that’s sexy, so folks interested in bedding a transman get both educated and titillated, while those of us who already appreciate the joys get to see trans bodies eroticized on screen in ways rarely shown.  Lucky for us, the sequel is already in the works with more types of transguys, so here’s to a much-needed series that will keep expanding the diversity of sexual experiences and bodies, and just keep getting sexier.

—Raybear

Watch the trailer for Sexing the Transman XXX here.

Buy Sexing the Transman XXX at these fine retail sites:

Hot Movies for Her (VOD)
The Smitten Kitten (DVD)
AEBN (VOD)
Sexing the Transman

Listen to or download Tristan’s interview with Buck Angel on Sex Out Loud.

Jul 232012
 

This week on Sex Out LoudAVN’s 2012 Female Performer of the Year Bobbi Starr joins us to talk about her love of the oboe, her award winning performances in movies like Belladonna: No Warning 4, directing her own line of films for Evil Angel, why she loves to push sexual boundaries, and where she sees herself in relation to the feminist porn movement. She gives us the scoop on creating ElectroSluts.com, what kinky sex does for her, and why electricity play is so hot. We’ll also get her take on the current controversy around mandating condom use for all porn performers in California. Plus, pro-BDSM sex-positive feminist activist, blogger, and author Clarisse Thorn discusses her new book The S&M Feminist. She’ll breakdown BDSM, women’s submissive fantasies, and the tensions between kink and feminism. Plus, she’ll give us a glimpse of her years spent researching pick up artists (like those in Neil Strauss’s bestselling book The Game and VH1’s hit reality show The Pick-Up Artist), which became the basis for her book Confessions of a Pickup Artist Chaser.

Bobbi Starr is a very hardcore kind of performer and director. Her scenes have been shot for gonzo companies like Evil Angel, Jules Jordan Video and Red Light District and she won AVN Awards for Most Outrageous Sex Scene and Best Double Penetration Sex Scene as well as an XRCO Award for Most Orgasmic Oralist and two consecutive wins for Superslut. You may have seen her on Kink.com’s websites in many of their scenes, and she’s also in demand in Europe, having received an AVN nomination for Best Sex Scene in a Foreign-Shot Production for “Into the Dark” from Daring Media Group and a coveted Hot d’Or nomination for Female American Performer of the Year. She’s also a former nationally ranked swimmer and a trained professional concert oboist. Follow her on Twitter @BobbiStarr

Clarisse Thorn is a feminist, sex-positive educator who has delivered sexuality workshops and lectures to a variety of audiences, including museums and universities across the USA. In 2009, she created and curated the ongoing Sex+++ sex-positive documentary film series at Chicago’s historic feminist site, Jane Addams Hull-House Museum. In 2010, she returned to the USA after working on HIV mitigation in southern Africa. She has also volunteered as an archivist, curator and fundraiser for that venerable S&M institution, the Leather Archives & Museum. Clarisse’s writing has appeared across the Internet in places like The Guardian, AlterNet, Feministe, Jezebel, The Good Men Project, Role/Reboot, and Time Out Chicago. Follow her on Twitter @ClarisseThorn

Jul 132012
 

 

Tonight I’m excited that The Mayhems are able to join us on Sex Out Loud! Here’s some info about them before we go live at 8 pm ET / 5 pm PT. (Don’t forget you can listen here.)

Meet The Mayhems
One day while shooting a couple’s scene for QueerPorn.TV, Maggie and Ned came to the sudden realization that there were no porn sites on the internet featuring real couples who both identified as queer switches. They were cautioned that viewers wouldn’t be able to handle a website where the content was unpredictable and especially warned that featuring footage of Ned having sex with women, men, and trans* performers would never sell because people weren’t ready for it. It was a challenge that they were prepared to face. Putting their mutual nerd chops to work, they built their website together from ground up as a 100% independent venture. In addition to challenging audiences with a couples website that was largely non-heteronormative, they have also included their own coverage of the Occupy movement, their challenges with credit card company censorship, and their exceptionally geeky experiments like the PSIgasm (Masters & Johnson in a wireless computer buttplug that detects quantitative data about the human arousal and orgasmic process in real time*). After being online for only 8 months they received a Feminist Porn Awards nomination and they are excited by the one year anniversary of MeetTheMayhems with no signs of slowing down yet.

Maggie Mayhem

When Maggie Mayhem started volunteering as an HIV test counselor at UC Santa Cruz in 2003, she had no idea how radically it would change the direction of her entire life. Before long, she became a vocal activist for harm reduction and sex positivity. She has served as the coordinator of the UC Santa Cruz Anonymous HIV testing program, HIV Senior Specialist of Larkin Street Youth Services, and grant recipient for HIV prevention and care work in Bagamoyo, Tanzania. Maggie Mayhem is also a writer, speaker, and performance artist as well as a queer porn performer who has appeared on Kink.Com, Crashpad Series, Madison Bound, Girlfriends Films, QueerPorn.TV, and on the website she built with her partner Ned, MeetTheMayhems.Com

Ned Mayhem

Ned Mayhem is a physics graduate student who has been a performer in straight, gay, and queer pornography since 2010. He has appeared in films that have been recognized at Cinekink, AVN, and Feminist Porn Awards. With his partner Maggie Mayhem, Ned runs the independent “DIY” porn site MeetTheMayhems.com showcasing the couple’s own brand of perversely heartwarming queer sexuality. Ned also uses the software he has developed for MeetTheMayhems to empower other adult performers and independent studios to control their own web presence and monetize their own content. In addition to MeetTheMayhems.com, Ned’s software runs such sites as Femifist.com, QueerlySF.com, and KittyStryker.com. Ned loves to share his pornographics enthusiasm with crowds, and he’s spoken at MomentumCon 2012, Sex Week at Harvard, Arse Elektronika, Hackmeet, Nerd Nite SF, and OpenSF.

 

 

Jul 082012
 


My head is still spinning from my first appearance on Melissa Harris-Perry on Saturday. Watch it below or at these links—Segment 1: Porn in America and Segment 2: The Business of Pornography. I’ve done a fair amount of television appearances, and I have mixed feelings about them. In the past, I feel like many TV producers shy away from difficult topics, don’t allow for complex, nuanced analysis, and often want me to “dumb it down.” This time, none of that happened. I was excited when a producer for the Melissa Harris-Perry show on MSNBC contacted me last week about a show about female sexuality and porn. We had a spirited conversation where I feel like she really listened to me, rather than attempted to fit me into a quasi-script she had already written. When I found out that one of my co-panelists was author and activist Jaclyn Friedman, I felt relieved to have a sex-positive feminist sister there.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Segment 1 of 2 “Porn in America”

Fun fact: Jaclyn Friedman and I were both in the class of ’93 at Wesleyan University, and we were fellow activists and friends during college. Although we’ve followed and supported each other’s careers since then (I blurbed her newest book What You Really Really Want: The Smart Girl’s Shame Free Guide to Sex and Safety and she appeared on my radio show Sex Out Loud), we hadn’t been in the same room since the late 90s. We had dinner the night before, and Jaclyn reminded me we wouldn’t talk about the show, so that everything would stay fresh for the next day. We had plenty of catching up to do, so it didn’t matter!

At every stage of the booking process, the folks behind the scenes at MHP were competent, respectful, and, well, have their shit together. In the green room before the show, Jaclyn and I met Zephyr Lookout (author of Mousepads, Shoe Leather, and Hope: Lessons from the Howard Dean Campaign for the Future of Internet Politics) who sat on the panel for an earlier segment and would be joining ours. She is a law professor at Fordham. I liked her immediately, and we bonded over our love of the children’s book Tuck Everlasting. She admitted she was “probably the most anti-porn of everyone on the panel,” which I appreciated her saying up front. It’s actually refreshing to engage with someone who really wants to dig into the topic and isn’t just ready to shut you down (like Gail Dines and crew are). After being fitted with our mics and mic packs (during which Jaclyn had her hands all the way up my dress to assist the sound guy), the three of us sat down at the table. That’s when I met the fourth panelist, Georgetown professor Michael Eric Dyson (author of Holler If You Hear Me), and I truly had no idea what he was going to say about porn. I was pleasantly surprised to discover he knows quite a bit about it (he name checked Lexington Steele and Mr. Marcus!) and had smart things to say.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Segment 2 of 2 “Business of Pornography”

MHP introduced me as a feminist pornographer and showed the cover of my new book The Feminist Porn Book: The Politics of Producing Pleasure, co-edited with Celine Parrenas Shimizu, Constance Penley, and Mireille Miller-Young and forthcoming from The Feminist Press at CUNY in 2013. The two segments just flew by so fast, and suddenly, she was doing the closing of the show (naming activist teen Julia Bluhm the Foot Soldier of the Week for petitioning Seventeen magazine).

Afterward, we all stood in the hallway, continuing the conversation, and I got to meet several more of the show’s producers including Jamil Smith and Executive Producer Shirley Zilberstein. Melissa Harris-Perry is so smart, it’s actually intimidating. But in a good way. Obviously, we barely scratched the surface on some pretty important topics. I have a whole lot more to say about race politics in the porn industry, shifting representations of sexuality in porn, today’s porn economy, queer porn, and on and on. But this was definitely a start, and great one.

Jaclyn Friedman, me, Melissa Harris-Perry, Michael Eric Dyson backstage at MHP

Very few mainstream media outlets, and even fewer, if any, television news shows are willing to look at porn in an intelligent or balanced way. I am so impressed that Melissa Harris-Perry and her producers took a risk and really broke down a barrier. I know they have already gotten flack about it from conservatives and anti-porn feminists. So, if you want to show your support for the topic of this show, applaud Melissa Harris-Perry and MSNBC for making space for this conversation, you can do so in a number of ways:

Watch the clips: Segment 1 “Porn in America” and Segment 2 “The Business of Pornography”

Comment on the blog about the segments

Email the MSNBC network with your support

Tweet your support to @MHPShow and @MSNBCTV

 

May 252012
 


June 5, doors 7:00 pm, pre-show 7:30 pm, show 8:00 pm
She Bop Presents The Feminist Porn Show with Tristan Taormino
“The Feminist Porn Show” is a special evening curated and hosted by Tristan Taormino to showcase feminist porn, a genre of adult film and a growing movement. Tristan will introduce the audience to the concept of feminist porn and discuss its history, then she’ll screen a curated selection of short clips from filmmakers around the world. The clip show features the work of both pioneers and newcomers, including Fatale Video, Candida Royalle, Annie Sprinkle, Nina Hartley, Jackie Strano and Shar Rednour, Petra Joy, Erika Lust, Shine Louise Houston, Anna Brownfield, Carlos Batts, N. Maxwell Lander, Emilie Jouvet, Louise Lush, Jaiya, Maria Beatty, Buck Angel, Madison Young, Nenna, Courtney Trouble, Morty Diamond, Tobi Hill-Meyer, Kelly Shibari, Loree Erickson and more. The screening will be followed by a facilitated discussion, where we’ll explore some of the current issues surrounding feminist porn. The pre-show will include a sexy performance from Felice Shays. Afterward, She Bop will be selling DVDs from the featured filmmakers, including Tristan’s films, and she will stick around to sign books and videos. And the party can continue at the adjoining Bar Bar! This event is general admission, so get there early for a good seat. Tickets are available in person at She Bop and Mississippi Studios, where there will be a $1 box office fee. If you buy tickets online, there is a $4.40 service charge.
Location: This special event is presented by She Bop, but will not be held at the store, it will be held at Mississippi Studios, 3939 N. Mississippi, Portland OR 97227
Admission: $25, buy tickets at She Bop (909 N. Beech Street, Portland, OR 97227), at Mississippi Studios (3939 N. Mississippi, Portland OR 97227, $1 box office fee), or online via Ticket Biscuit ($4.40 service charge)
Info: info at sheboptheshop.com and 503-473-8018, Twitter: @SheBopTheShop

ALSO: TICKETS STILL AVAILABLE FOR TRISTAN’S OPEN RELATIONSHIP WORKSHOP ON JUNE 3:

June 3, 7:30 pm
She Bop Presents: Making Open Relationships Work
Do open relationships really work? How do people create nontraditional partnerships that are loving and lasting? Tristan Taormino, relationship expert and author of Opening Up, shares some of the key principles that can help your open relationship(s) succeed. She’ll discuss common issues and problems-from “new relationship energy” and time management to jealousy and agreement violations -and ways to address and resolve them. Tristan will offer tips on communication, negotiation, and boundary setting, as well as how to cope with change. Learn how to get to the root of jealous feelings and transform them by embracing the concept of compersion. Whether you’re a newcomer or veteran to the world beyond monogamy, come discover strategies to help you nurture and grow your open relationship(s).
Location: This workshop is presented by She Bop, but will not be held at the store, it will be held at the Q Center, which is 3 blocks up the street from She Bop at the corner of Mississippi and Mason (4115 N. Mississippi).
Admission: $25, buy tickets at the store (909 N. Beech Street, Portland, OR 97227), by phone 503-473-8018 or online
Info: info at sheboptheshop.com and 503-473-8018, Twitter: @SheBopTheShop

May 182012
 

Author, Sex Educator, Filmmaker Tristan Taormino to Host Show on VoiceAmerica Radio Network

Tristan Taormino, internationally acclaimed author, sex educator, college lecturer, and feminist pornographer “Sex Out Loud” on VoiceAmerica Talk Radio Network. The show debuts June 1 at 5 pm Pacific Time, 8 pm Eastern Time.

PHOENIX, AZ, May 21, 2012 – VoiceAmerica Talk Radio Network, Internet broadcasting pioneer, producing and syndicating online audio and video, today announced the debut of Sex Out Loud, hosted by internationally acclaimed author, sex educator, college lecturer, and feminist pornographer Tristan Taormino on the VoiceAmerica Variety Channel on Friday, June 1, at 5 pm Pacific Time, 8 pm Eastern Time.

Sex Out Loud explores the world of sexuality from every angle. Tristan Taormino will interview leading authors, educators, artists and icons and give listeners an uncensored, inside look at alternative sexual practices and communities. She’ll delve into topics from the popular to the taboo, including sex education and sexual health, erotic fantasies, BDSM, non-monogamy, the adult industry, and more. Tristan and her guests will also answer listeners’ questions live. Her first guest will be Dan Savage, sex advice columnist, author, co-creator of the “It Gets Better” campaign, and star of MTV’s “Savage U.” Upcoming guests include Kate Bornstein, Buck Angel, Jaclyn Friedman, Jessica Valenti, Bobbi Starr, Susie Bright, and her daughter, Aretha Bright.

Tristan has been educating and entertaining people for over fifteen years. A former columnist for “The Village Voice,” Tristan’s sex-positive attitude and sharp wit have made her a sought after guest on radio and television shows across the United States and abroad including “Howard Stern,” “Loveline,” “Ricki Lake,” and HBO’s “Real Sex.” Most notably, she was a recurring guest on “Ricki Lake” for two seasons, gave sex advice to Danny Bonaduce and the late Dick Clark on the NBC talk show “The Other Half,” and debated Dr. Drew Pinsky and Joe Scarborough on MSNBC. She is a widely recognized expert on sex education, GLBT issues, alternative relationships, and feminist pornography. She frequently lectures at top colleges and universities, including Harvard, Yale, Cornell, Princeton, Columbia, Brown, UCLA, and NYU.

“Tristan Taormino is known around the world for her honest, down to earth, sex-positive advice, books, and films,” says Karen Dana, Executive Producer of Sex Out Loud. “We are so thrilled that she’s joining the VoiceAmerica Network, and her show is sure to inform and inspire our listeners.” Sex Out Loud follows Sex with Jaiya, the Variety Channel’s most popular show, giving listeners two hours of exciting, informative sex education.

Sex Out Loud is sponsored by The Smitten Kitten, an award-winning progressive sex toy retailer; Astroglide, one of the leading personal lubricant brands; and We-Vibe, the most popular rechargeable vibrator for couples in the world.

Sex Out Loud airs live on Fridays at 5 pm Pacific / 7 pm Central / 8 pm Eastern on The VoiceAmerica Variety Channel. To read more about the show, go to sexoutloudradio.com. To access the show, log on at http://www.voiceamerica.com/show/2096/sex-out-loud. All shows will be available in Tristan Taormino’s Content Library on The VoiceAmerica Variety Channel for on-demand and podcast download.

May 042012
 

Cyndi's amazing classic car

We arrived at the Melbourne Airport and Cyndi Darnell, sex therapist, counselor, sex educator, and creator of Pleasure Salon Melbourne, picked us up at the airport. We’d met her in Sydney at Xplore and connected right away. Cyndi drove us in her classic car, which turns heads wherever it goes. She took us to where we’d be staying, the home of Fiona Patten, the CEO of the Eros Association, Inc. (Australia’s national adult retail and entertainment trade association) and the head of the Australian Sex Party, a progressive political party that supports free speech, the adult industry, sex workers’ rights, comprehensive sex education, gender equality, same sex marriage, decriminalization of drugs, and more. Fiona is a total bad ass: a smart, articulate, radical, multitasking whirlwind of sex-positive politics. It’s inspiring to be in her presence. She was super busy taking media calls and preparing for her presentation at The 2012 Atheist Convention, which took place at the same time we were in Melbourne. Fiona took us to a wonderful dinner out with two adult industry distributors and an American who was in town for AdultEx. We talked about legal issues surrounding selling and distributing porn in Australia, politics, and the Bong Task Force (the SNL skit writes itself).

The window display at Hares and Hyenas

The next day, Cyndi picked us up and we headed to Fitzroy, the artsy neighborhood of Melbourne. We went to Hares and Hyenas, an LGBT bookstore that’s been in busy for over 20 years. I was shocked to see that the entire window display was devoted to my books! It was beautiful, and I felt honored. It’s an amazing shop, and we scooped up lots of local books and magazines, including Dude Magazine, Dirty Queer Magazine, f2m: The Boy Within, and The Drag Queen Baby Name Book (a gift for friends who are expecting). We met the owners, Rowland and Crusader, who were wonderfully warm and charming. We went to another great bookstore, PolyEster Books (“world’s freakiest bookstore”), which carried tons of great sex books, including those from small and obscure presses, I was very impressed. I would later regret just how many books I bought as I dragged them back to the States (they weighed a ton!). Then, we went to some art galleries, which were closed for various unexpected reasons. Ah, artists. But it didn’t matter, really, because there was so much amazing street art throughout the neighborhood.

Just one example of the amazing street art in Melbourne

That night was my first presentation for Pleasure Salon Melbourne. It was simply an amazing night. There were about 150 people there.

A view from the audience at my Pleasure Salon Melbourne talk (photo courtesy of msnaughty.com)

I spoke for about 45 minutes, then we had intermission. Rowland from Hares and Hyenas was there with cartons of books, and by the end of intermission, he had sold out of several titles! It was totally overwhelming.

My books (photo courtesy of msnaughty.com)

At the end of the evening, I stayed as audience members waited almost an hour to have their books signed by me. Each person I met told me a little something about themselves, and they were all fantastic. Fiona Patten and friends were there. There was a pack of adorable queers, including Kit, Louise, and Lauren from D.VICE, a lesbian-owned sex-positive sex shop in New Zealand and Australia. Two of them had me autograph their boobs. It was my pleasure. I finally got to meet several women in person who I’ve corresponded with by email or Skype, including sex therapist Sandra Pertot, who wrote an amazing book called When Your Sex Drives Don’t Match. I met Lyndal Coon, whose new book Sexual Biversity: Loving My Bisexual Husband was just released and sex-positive coach Chantelle Austin, author of The Essential Guide for Adventurous Couples…Who Want to Explore Threesomes, Foursomes, and Moresomes. All the sex and porn people were there: Anna Brownfield (winner of a Feminist Porn Award for The Band), feminist pornographers Ms. Naughty from ForTheGirls.com (who blogged about my talk) and Gala Vanting, Blair from Adult Voyeur, a spunky, gorgeous performer named Angela White, and blogger Ultra Hedonist.

I was blown away by the audience at Pleasure Salon Melbourne. It was overwhelming, actually. Thanks to each and every person who came, asked questions, introduced themselves, and supported me and the local sex-positive community.