Anal Advisor: In Anal Agony

I feel like my current relationship will cause my entire existence to revolve around my asshole! I’m no anal virgin, mind you. I’ve got plenty of experience with enemas, plugs, fucking and exploration. I rather enjoy it all! But how much is too much? I am in a Dominant/submissive relationship, and my Master has recently requested that I remain plugged 24/7/365, only removing it to relieve myself or during extreme illness or injury. When I wear a plug for a long time, I get sore and unpleasantly distracted very quickly. I know this isn’t always a bad thing, but it’s starting to interfere with my work and overall life. He also expects me to do complete enemas with a shower hose every day. Right now, I’ve only got the resources to do that once or twice a week, but it plays hell with my whole system for days afterwards!

Does it get better with time and a more stringent routine? So much of it already throws off my entire being! I’ve run the predictable course of diarrhea, constipation, nausea, loss of appetite, cramping, soreness, irritation and have lost a considerable amount of weight (20 pounds) in just over a month. I can’t say that all of it is related to the new ass attentions, but I’m certain that the majority is.

How do I continue to want to do what my Master expects of me and not flatly refuse what I think will ultimately cause damage? I just don’t want to be hurting and sick all the time. Everything seems to revolve around my ass. It’s frustrating and doesn’t make me feel anywhere nearly as good as I want it to. Instead of feeling clean and “free” afterwards, or pleasantly full and reminded, I feel more drained and exhausted. Sure, my ass might smell like daisies and be stretched to “convenient” proportions, but it’s no fun anymore and goes way beyond that.

I sometimes even feel like without my ass, what would He want with me? I don’t want to take the fun out of it for my Master, but I feel like if I can’t get over this one hurdle. So much of His passion is about anal, so our whole compatibility might be in jeopardy. He cares about me and I don’t think He wants to intentionally hurt me, but I’m barely keeping up! What can I do?

–In Anal Agony

You are missing two critical elements in your Dominant/submissive relationship: consent and mutual satisfaction. It sounds to me like you are blindly following orders that are physically harming you and that you don’t enjoy on any level. D/s relationships can help us test our own boundaries, but the relationship you describe is way out of bounds. No one should have an enema every day. No one can wear a butt plug 24/7. It sounds like your Master has been reading too much fantasy fiction and hasn’t had enough real-world experience, because what he is asking of you is impractical, unsafe, and bizarre. I support fantasizing about wild, out there things and I support Dominants who threaten submissives with various kinds of torture, but this crosses the line. You must speak up for yourself and he must be willing to negotiate more realistic expectations, otherwise this is a one-way relationship you shouldn’t be in.