My fiancé and I have been exploring BDSM, which we enjoy fully. He wants to have anal sex with me, and although it would be the first for me, I’m willing to try it out at least once. He does have a really big penis — gloriously big — and I’m concerned about the process as I’m a small woman. Is there anything I can do to prepare myself for him and make this enjoyable for both of us?
–Tiny But Tempted
Your physical size does not necessarily correlate with your ability to take a “gloriously big” cock up your ass. I’ve seen women who are five feet tall and 98 pounds with very large things comfortably nestled in their behinds. It’s more about your internal than your external size. Like the pussy, the ass has the ability to expand when you’re aroused. Plus, the rectum is longer than the vagina and therefore can usually accommodate something bigger.
However, since your guy is larger than average, it means that you’re going to have to work your way up slowly. And since it’s your very first anal adventure, his cock should not go into your ass all in one evening. Instead, I recommend that you begin playing with a finger or a slim toy either alone or with him. Use plenty of lube, go slowly, and stimulate your clit. When you’ve practiced a few times with the one finger/small toy, and it feels great, you can move on to two fingers or a slightly bigger toy. Again, you can play together or you can add anal play to your masturbation. The important thing is not to rush the process. Find a dildo that’s “one step down” from your man’s cock. When you’ve worked up to taking that dildo, and it’s comfortable and pleasurable, then you can try his cock. Make sure he goes very slowly, and that you give him lots of feedback about how it feels. If you both take your time and let your ass set the pace, it will reward you in the end!