Big E

Apr 252004
 

I’m 29 years old, and I have been putting things up my ass for about ten years now. I’ve worked my way up to take equivalent of three cucumbers. The last time I put things up my ass, the most bizarre thing happened, and it’s happened once before about a year ago. I like watery vegetables because I feel like I need less lube and my ass gets a “wet silk” feeling from them. After I inserted a peeled cucumber, I had this allergy-like reaction all over my body. The same thing happened last year with a carrot. Nothing grave, just red, itchy, swollen eyes etc. which went away in about an hour. I know what it is since I’ve been allergic to lots of stuff since I was a child and still have serious hayfever. Is it the absorption of the vegetable juices by my rectum that causes the allergy or something else? Any knowledge of anybody experiencing this, or what it could be exactly? I mean, one does not want to go into anaphylactic shock with a set of cucumbers up one’s ass, right?

–Big E

If I have told you once, I’ve told you a million times: leave the vegetables in the kitchen and out of your ass! Of all food allergies, allergies to vegetables are not as common as others, however there is some research which shows that certain foods — including melon, banana, zucchini and cucumber — as well as the popular herb chamomile, can aggravate ragweed allergies. Symptoms include itching and tingling of the mouth, lips, throat, and ears, and in more serious cases, the swelling of tissue or anaphylactic shock. You said that you have allergies and hayfever, so my guess is that’s you’re allergic to ragweed, and some of the vegetables you’re sticking up your ass are exacerbating this allergy. One more example of why you should stick to silicone, rather than organic, phallic objects!

Double Dildo Dilemma

Apr 172004
 

I was hoping to get some of your good advice before purchasing a strap-on to fuck my girlfriend in the ass. I came across one called the “double whammy”, a two-headed dildo which has one long shaft to insert in the recipient and another shorter shaft to insert in the wearer of the strap-on harness. This enables the one doing the fucking (me) to feel some penetration herself and thus enjoy the whole thing a little more. Have you in your years of experience come across one of these things and if so are they any good for either partner? What does it feel like for the wearer? Can the wearer really get off while fucking the other person?

–Double Dildo Dilemma

Most double ended dildos are just like one long dildo with two heads, and, while they can be fun for partners to share, they can’t be used with a strap-on harness. The toy that you described sounds to me like the Nexus, a silicone double-headed dildo from Vixen Creations that was designed specifically for use with a harness. One end sticks out of the harness for fucking your girl, and the other slips inside you. As you thrust with your hips to push the dildo inside your partner, the other end penetrates you. The Nexus is a totally unique toy, and one that lots of people rave about; I’ve used it myself and really like it. It comes in two sizes, and is ideal if the size of each dildo works for each partner.

As to your question, “Can the wearer really get off while fucking the other person?” Well, that all depends on how the wearer gets off! For some women, wearing a standard (not two headed) dildo in a harness is very arousing since as you start thrusting, the base of the dildo can rub up against your clit. Also, there are vibrating dildos that can be used in a harness, to give the wearer (and her partner) plenty of buzz where it counts. If penetration is what gets you off, and the Nexus hits the right spot, then it can add a whole new level to your strap-on pleasure.

Anal Lovers in Delaware

Apr 022004
 

My girlfriend and I like anal sex a lot, and we always talk dirty about using anal beads when we are doing it. I have no doubt she wants me to get them, but I am curious about a couple things. Are there anal beads for first timers? What do they do exactly? Is there a guide on how to use them? How can we use them so she gets the most pleasure out of the experience?

–Anal Lovers in Delaware

Anal beads come in a variety of styles. The beads can be made of hard plastic or rubber, and there can be anywhere from five to ten attached by a string that runs through them. The string is usually made of cotton or nylon, and the beads can be all the same size or they can graduate in size. I caution you when shopping for this particular kind of toy, since there are lots of cheaply made anal beads on the market. Avoid hard plastic beads with obvious seams that feel sharp to the touch of the finger — they will irritate the delicate lining of the rectum; some people may also find that the knots in the string between beads feel uncomfortable inside the ass. Remember that nearly all beads on any kind of string may be cleaned but not disinfected, so it’s not a good idea to share anal beads with others. There are other toys, made of rubber or silicone, that have designs which are reminiscent of anal beads, but are one continuous piece without any string. These are much easier to clean (although remember that only silicone is non-porous) and are generally more comfortable.

For first timers, I recommend you pick small beads, and gradually work your way up to larger sizes if you discover you like them. As for the how-to, here goes: for some people, the moment when the sphincter muscles relax and allow for that first moment of pleasurable penetration is incredibly hot. With anal beads, you can experience that first-penetration feeling over and over, since the muscles open to accommodate the bead, then close around it, then open for the next bead, and so on. You should slip one well-lubed bead at a time in your girlfriend’s ass. Once they are all in (or as many are in as she wants), you can (slowly!) pull the entire string of beads out, creating an entirely different, but equally intense, sensation. Some folks like this grand exit to happen when they feel close to orgasm, in order to push them over the edge; others like to wait until they are coming to intensify the climax. You can also keep them in until after you’ve come. Like any other toy, experiment and find out what works best for you.

Liar, Liar, Ass on Fire?

Feb 102004
 

Have you heard of figging? Do you think it’s safe to do? My submissive and I are headed to a party next week where figging is to be the central theme. Any information you could provide would be very useful.

–Liar, Liar, Ass on Fire?

For readers who may not know what it is, let me begin with a definition. Rumored to have been practiced as early as the Victorian era (they were so kinky!), figging involves sticking a ginger root up someone’s (or your own) ass, and most people I know do it in the context of a BDSM scene. The idea is that the ginger illicits an intense, long-lasting burning sensation in the sensitive, delicate tissue of the rectum. I’ve heard of some Dominants who insert the root into a submissive’s ass before a spanking, paddling, or caning. The longer the root is inside the butt, and the more blood that rushes to the area, the stronger the burning. Plus, any kind of movement — including clenching the sphincter muscle s– increases the fiery feeling.

This is not an activity for anal play novices or people with extra-sensitive behinds. I consider it an internal form of genitorture; if your bottom enjoys sensation play like ice cubes or metholated sports creams on her pussy lips or her anus, figging takes this “torture” one step further. Plus, you should not use creams like Ben Gay or Icy Hot inside the pussy or ass. While some bottoms say that figging feels warm and tingly like the creams, most report that the sensation is ten times more intense.

There are a few safety tips that go along with this practice. You should begin with a fresh, whole ginger piece (also called a hand), and peel off the brown rough skin before slicing a “finger” to use for penetration. Because it obviously does not have a flared base (and therefore could get lost in the ass), select the largest piece you can find, and either carve out your own shape with a base or attach a string to it in order to make it easy to retrieve. After handling a peeled root, you shouldn’t touch your eyes or your slave’s eyes. Some figging fans say that lube can seal in the moisture and prevent it from releasing, thereby defeating the purpose, but you know my stance on lube: you need it! Other than those precautions, as with all perverted activities, use your common sense.

Slave Butt in Training

Jan 162004
 

My Master wants to give me anal training so that I can take a lot of use that way. I am not a virgin, but it has been some time since I have had any anal contact. What would be the best way to do this? He thought that putting a butt plug in me for five minutes twice a day would do it. I have tried this, but have only had problems with it. Perhaps it’s the plug. I am not sure what the plug is made of — it’s a hard-but-flexible plastic on the outside with a different type of plastic on the inside. It hurts when I stick it in, and that’s not helping my ass get properly trained. What should I do?

–Slave Butt in Training

Your Master has the right idea: anal training is a great way to mentally reinforce the Dominant/submissive dynamic as well as physically prepare your ass for extended anal play. I, too, use butt plugs as part of my anal training regimen.

The method I think that works best is to set up a plan for a bottom, where he or she gradually increases a number of elements. First, start with a very small plug and wear it for fifteen minutes. Continue to wear the small plug each day, adding fifteen minutes to the ritual. After a week, switch to a butt plug that’s slightly bigger, and start back at the fifteen minute mark, working your way up for another week. With each week, increase the size of the plug and the duration that you are wearing it. When you reach a large plug, with each new week, instead of changing the size, just up the amount of time you wear it. Use plenty of lube, and, if your Master allows it, play with your clit to make the experience more pleasurable (this will also relax your entire genital region and help you take more for longer). If it still hurts, honor your body’s response and go back down to the smaller sized plug, staying with it until you feel ready for more.

As for the type of plug, toys made partially or entirely of hard plastic aren’t a good idea for anal novices or the beginning of training. I recommend something soft and flexible made of either latex, vinyl, or silicone. Once you’re a pro, then you can move on to bigger, harder, heavier toys.

Plugged-up Slave

Dec 112003
 

My Mistress would like me to wear a butt plug daily. I’ve agreed to a small one, but she really wants me to wear a large one because she thinks that a bigger plug will make me more submissive to her. Is it possible and harmless?

–Plugged-up Slave

Wearing a butt plug every day is possible and harmless, as long as you use plenty of lube, and you warm up your ass with fingers or a smaller toy first. You should be aware of a butt plug, but it should not feel uncomfortable or painful at all. If you plan to wear it for several hours, you should work your way up in small increments in order to allow your body time to adjust to the new activity; in other words, if you’ve only ever had a plug in for fifteen minutes, don’t try it for four hours. As to the matter of your level of submissiveness, only you and your Mistress can really answer that. A bigger plug may make you more aware of your ass, and, by extension, help you focus on your dedication and service to your Mistress. But the size of a butt plug alone does not affect one’s level of submission — bigger does not always inspire better.

Jonesin’ for Jewels

Dec 052003
 

I am very aroused by the anal jewelry worn by one of the actresses in Evil Angel’s The Fashionistas. I would like to get something like that for my girlfriend, but the only ones I can find start at around $75. This is a little bit much for a broke college student. Are there any alternatives that come to mind which are cheaper and safe?

–Jonesin’ for Jewels

I assume that the ones you found are Rosebuds Erotic Jewelry by designer Julian Snelling. Based in France, Snelling creates truly unique butt plugs made of stainless steel or bronze; each base is crafted with precious metals and semi-precious stones (like amethyst and malachite) to look like jewelry. When you slide the plug inside someone’s ass and all that remains is the base, the effect is kind of like a pierced ear but for your butt! It’s like wearing a work of art in your ass. No one has even tried to copy Snelling, so unfortunately there aren’t any cheap Snelling knock-offs.

If an artsy anal plug is what you’re after, lots of silicone sex toy manufacturers have risen to the call: Vixen Creations makes its Buddy plug in sparkly sliver, gold, or pink glitter; Tantus has stunning metallic colored plugs; and there are several other multi-colored swirled anal toys.

Losing My Marbles

Oct 082003
 

In Anne Rice’s erotic novel The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty, there is a scene where Beauty was made to play a game: twenty roses were scattered all around a room where the Queen sat, and Beauty had to crawl around and pick the roses up and return them, one-by-one to the Queen, all the while being flogged to keep up her pace. Every time Beauty would bring a rose, the Queen would stick a large gold marble in Beauty’s ass. The trick being that the further along she got, the harder it was to keep going without dropping the marbles.

My husband and I thought this was really hot, and we’d love to play it out, but we are concerned with the idea of losing a marble inside my ass. Could that happen, and if so, what could we do to prevent it? We have worked with anal beads before, but there are only so many on a string, and those knots can sting! What can you suggest?

–Losing My Marbles

While I love erotic fiction as much as the next kinky reader, when it comes to representations of bondage, sadistic sensation play, and other BDSM activities, you need to remember that half of the stuff that fictional characters do in books isn’t even physically possible, let alone safe or meant to be instructional. Many, but not all, writers of leather smut have never actually done any of the things they write about. Or, even if they are players in real life, often they still indulge in fantastic fantasies they know are great to jerk off to; they don’t mean for anyone to try to replicate them.

The scene you describe from The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty is an example of a sexy scenario that’s not practical, and could be physically harmful. In general, anything you put in the ass should have a flared base (like on a dildo or butt plug) or another way to stop it from going all the way inside (like the ring on the end of a string of anal beads). Obviously, marbles don’t qualify, and they could get lost inside your ass. You’ve already played with anal beads, and you’re right, most people find the knots of the nylon or cotton rope pretty uncomfortable.

I have several suggestions for scenes that may appeal to you. If you want to be surprised, now is the time to stop reading and hand the magazine over to your husband. Several sex toy manufacturers sell toys which are a continuous series of beads, but the toy is all one piece (no string, no knots); some have several beads of the same size, while others have graduated beads which get larger and larger. Your husband can insert the first bead, send you off to retrieve rose #1, then slide the second bead inside, and so on. It creates a similar effect as the marbles with a toy that’s completely safe.

Or, if the goal is to make it increasingly difficult to keep the object inside your ass as you retrieve the roses, he can begin with a silicone butt plug, and, each new round, replace it with a plug made of a heavier material, moving from clear acrylic to glass to marble to stainless steel. I’ve used all of these high-end toys, and can tell you that when you stand up with a steel butt plug in your ass, it feels like a barbell that’s fighting gravity! A similar effect can be achieved with only one butt plug and a series of small weights usually used for cock and ball play or genitorture. Find a way to attach the weights to the base of the plug (I suggest a small piece around the rounded base), you can keep increasing the amount of weight each time a rose is retrieved. Use the story in the book as inspiration, but then be creative and create a scene that’s clever, cruel, whatever works for you. Most important, make it safe.

Silky Bum Rag Virgin

Jul 212003
 

I recently heard of a kind of anal play called “the silky bum rag” and am curious to find out more about it. None of my pervy friends have never heard of it or tried it. From what I’ve heard, a cloth, silk scarf, or handkerchief is slowly and sensuously inserted anally, and pulled out at the point of orgasm. My girlfriend and I both want to try this. Have you ever done anything similar? If so, what is it like and can you give us any pointers?

–Silky Bum Rag Virgin

Just when I think I have heard, read, seen, and experienced all there is to experience in the world of anal play, I get a letter like yours! I have not heard of “the silky bum rag,” but that doesn’t mean it’s not happening out there. My initial thought is that a piece of fabric is not going to feel like much sliding inside your ass or once it’s in there; it doesn’t have enough weight or size to it to create an intense sensation. However, I can see the appeal of it coming out when you are about to climax. Like a string of anal beads (although a completely different texture, of course), a soft scarf being pulled out of your ass could be extremely pleasurable. My one caution is that the scarf should be long enough so that it never goes all the way inside. Keep enough fabric outside the body to hang onto, so it doesn’t get lost in your ass.

Beginning to Understand The Thrill

Jun 032003
 

It’s probably hard to believe this but I’m 50 and only now really getting into anal sex. I’ve done it before, of course, but it never turned me on much. I’ve recently met a guy online who does hypnosis, and we’ve been working on opening up my horizons. I just got a butt plug and had it in for about 20-30 minutes. When I went to wash it, however, I noticed two little spots near the top. I figured that it was probably normal to encounter a small amount of residue and didn’t think much about it. The problem is that I just can’t wash the spots off!!! It’s like they’re part of the red material of the plug, which I think is silicone. No amount of soap and water will remove them. What’s going on? And speaking of stains, does silicone lube stain sheets?

–Begining to Understand The Thrill

I suspect the butt plug is not silicone for two reasons: silicone is high quality material that doesn’t stain, and silicone toys are incompatible with silicone lubes. So, a silicone lube cannot ever be washed off and effectively ruins a silicone toy. Since you made no mention of your toy being ruined, and you were able to wash it, I think the butt plug is probably made of latex rubber. Rubber plugs, on the other hand, especially the jelly toys, are incredibly porous, they absorb lots of things they come into contact with, like bodily fluids, and so they do stain pretty easily. So, you should invest in silicone or use a condom on the rubber toy to prevent future stains.

As for your sheets, the packaging of some silicone lube brands says “non-staining,” whereas other brands recommend testing it out on the fabric because staining is possible.

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