Sep 292000

My husband and I just experienced anal sex. We have tried this adventure before, but it has always been painful to me. Your advice for him to stimulate other areas helped me relax this time. Also, we found the doggie-style/head down/butt up position comfortable for both of us. My husband is an anal sex lover, and now I feel I can fulfill his passions and enjoy the experience myself. Thank you so much for such knowledgeable information and guidance. Now, for my question: does an anal orgasm come with experience, and is it more intense than the vaginal orgasm?

—T. D.

It is letters like yours that make my job so fulfilling! When I know that my work has helped someone experience the mind-blowing pleasures of anal sex, I feel that my mission is accomplished. On to your question about anal orgasms. Women experience pleasure from anal sex is a variety of different ways. The anal area is so rich in nerve endings that stimulating such an erogenous zone could certainly bring you to orgasm. Some women like to combine clitoral stimulation with anal penetration. When I work my clit while my ass is being fucked, and I come, the orgasm definitely feels different than if I was just having clit stimulation. It feels stronger, more intense, and like more of a full-body orgasm, rather than one primarily centered between my legs.

Although we don’t have a prostate gland like men, women do have a G-spot. The G-spot is reached through the front wall of the vagina, but it can also be indirectly stimulated through anal penetration. If you angle a finger, toy, or penis towards the front wall of the vagina, you may experience G-spot stimulation and come that way.

In addition to the bundle of physical pleasure that anal stimulation brings, there are complex emotional and psychological issues which contribute to the erotic experience. For some people, the idea that anal sex is naughty, forbidden and taboo is very exciting, and adds to their enjoyment of it. For me, the amount of trust I must have in my partner heightens my physical pleasure. Anal sex is my way of saying, “Here is a delicate part of my body, and I trust you not to hurt me but to make me feel very good.” That power exchange can be very intense. A world of orgasmic possibilities await you.

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