I’m a woman who loves anything anal especially having my ass tongued. In the past, I had a boyfriend that also liked it. I liked licking his ass because it turned him on a lot. How do I find out if my current boyfriend might be into a rim job without him thinking that I am a freak? He is very open, but I guess I am just afraid to ask. Is this a common thing with men, for them to like having their ass tongued?
–Aiming to Please
In the past five years, there has been a lot more dialogue on straight men receiving (and enjoying) anal pleasure. It’s what I like to refer to as the “Bend Over Boyfriend” movement, named for the great how-to video of the same name. So know that more men than ever are embracing this kind of stimulation and being more ‘out’ about it.
How you bring it up with your boyfriend depends a lot on your personal style and how you communicate about sex as a couple. If you’re direct, by all means ask him about it; make sure you talk about how much it would turn you on. If you’re feeling unsure and want to test the waters, you could raise the issue indirectly, with a conversation starter like: “I read about women rimming men in a magazine, what do you think of that?” Find a hot erotic story that involves a woman rimming a man and read it to him as a bedtime tale. See what his reaction is to it. Or maybe you want to drop some hints during your next sex session. Try gently stimulating his asshole with your finger, and see what kind of reaction it elicits. Pay attention to his body language and the non-verbal cues he gives you. If he seems comfortable and turned on by it, the next time you’re down there licking his balls, venture farther down. Make sure after you do it to talk about it later to see how it felt for him and get feedback about what else he might like.
One Response to “Anal Advisor: Aiming to Please”
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The obvious way to find out if your boyfriend wants a rim job is to start with a blowjob which you can be absolutely sure he will enjoy unless your boyfriend is seriously repressed (a survey of men at Harvard found 100% enjoy getting blown). While tonguing his balls, flick your tongue on his perineum. If you are nervous cover your bets, use it as a landing strip to lick his balls — just miss the base of his scrotum by half an inch. Trust me: you will get a reaction. You can judge your next move by his reaction. If he says it feels good, then your path is clear. If he just twitches, ask if it felt good (or is he OK). Or keep at it and take a few more misses then start tracing his perineum with your tongue. Somehow I doubt any man is going to resist anything at that point.