Feb 272005

I love anal sex — much more than vaginal. I love the pressure just before the head pops in and that little ache as it does. What I am having problems with is that everything that goes in my ass seems too long. It feels almost like the dick or the toy is hitting something inside of me, and it hurts. I have a friend I play with and we do a lot of BDSM scenes, especially rape scenes and punishment-type scenes. He would like to see just how much my butt can take, and I do love the width of everything, especially the next day. Can you help me with the length problem?

–Woodstock Girl

Unlike the vagina, the rectum is not a straight tube. It has a gentle curve, first tipping forward toward the front of the body, then away, then forward again. Everyone’s curves are different, and some are more pronounced than others. As a result, if you stick anything straight inside the rectum, you can wind up hitting the rectal wall, which is not a good feeling for anyone. It sounds like that may be the sensation you described. Have your partner experiment with different positions and angles when he fucks you in the ass, and see if there’s one that allows for penetration without the pain. Toys made of flexible materials are more comfortable and bend easier with your curves; if a toy itself is curved, the curve should be aimed toward the front of the body. All that said, you can also have a short rectum. Since you get pleasure from wide toys, I say invest is some short but wide dildos or butt plugs — go with what works!

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